Here it is March and Valentine’s Day has come and gone. We joke that Valentine’s Day is for the florists to get rich and that romance shouldn’t be saved up for only one day a year. Romance lives – in first loves, young love, second-chance love, and in married-for-years love. But, how DOES love endure, year after year? As we face our golden years and our “best of times,” in retirement, romance is more important than ever. Agreed?
My wife and I have a mutual affection for those elegant, elder couples who’ve loved for years. Still holding hands, looking at each other when they speak, and clearly enjoy each other’s company. They have figured it out. I believe it is the little things that show love:
- Love appreciates.
- Love gives undivided attention.
- Love takes care to not use hurtful words or asks for forgiveness, when failing this.
- Love is tolerant and has given up trying to change the other.
- Love means being friends.
- Love means having a life, separate from each other.
- Love means just listening, sometimes.
- Love means remembering romantic details (dates, wearing gifts that the other gave, a favorite dish).
- Love means telling their mate that they are seen in the way that they want to be seen (beautiful, strong, handy, or a fabulous cook).
- Love means remembering what your partner role is and living up to it.
- Love means taking time for connection, whether it is in the kiss good bye or the touching-base phone call.
- STILL – it is the little things – public affection, ordering for each other, picking up after each other, bringing each other a second cup of coffee – those are the things that show closeness and respect and help love endure.
After all this thinking about romance (difficult for my engineer mind), I am exhausted. YOUR turn: What does your partner do that makes you feel appreciated? What special “little thing” makes you feel loved?
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